Mental Wellness

Every Little Thing I See

As a child I noticed flowers every once and a while when I came across them. As an adult they form the patchwork quilt of my thoughts. Every summer walk I am compelled to take photos of the flowers in our neighborhood. I find it difficult to pass by the opportunity to capture the fleeting floral images. I stop, I crouch, I stand on tip toe, I lean. Finding the camera angle and time of day to take the best picture is like a meditation. Results vary; a few photos shine, a few photos fail, but the time behind the lens brings me joy. Sharing photos on my websites has doubled my joy.

What do you love to do?

Happy Manic Moon-day! –Rebecca

For more nature photos see: https://fakeflamenco.com/2021/08/28/fotd-satellite-dish-or-hibiscus-bloom/

Maiden’s Bower Photo: Rebecca Cuningham
Mental Wellness

2 Weeks of Walking, Swimming, and Paddling

I barely moved for 14 months. I sat in a chair, read, blogged, got up once and a while to make family meals. Walking upstairs made me breathe heavily. That was me in the pandemic. Once in a while I masked up and took a walk or biked somewhere when the weather was good. Mostly, I got beyond cabin fever to not even want to leave the house. I certainly didn’t feel like swimming indoors.

This summer, I decided to reclaim the peace of mind that is fitness. It’s easier to be calmer when I’m getting exercise. I promised myself I would walk at least for 15 minutes a day, or swim as many laps as I could in the pool, paddle for an hour, or bike to do errands six days a week.

I am happy to say that now I have two weeks where I’ve accomplished my goal!

I sleep better, socialize more easily and feel better about myself when I’m active.

Also a plus, no more huffing and puffing up the stairs!

Do you have an exercise routine? Does it help your mental health?

Happy Manic Monday! –Rebecca

Kayak with Water Lily Photo: Rebecca Cuningham
Mental Wellness

What Makes Me Happy?

Garden blooms make me smile. A little water, a little weeding, a little waiting and nature comes through with amazing colors.

Red Monarda – Bee Balm Photo: Rebecca Cuningham
Pink Hollyhocks Photo: Rebecca Cuningham
Pinks and Seedum Blooms Photo: Rebecca Cuningham

What makes you happy?

Happy Manic Monday! –Rebecca

Bipolar

Another 1 Bites the Dust

My therapist is quitting. Last week she phrased it as if I were “graduating” from therapy. Then she asked right away how I felt about it. I said I’d think about it and tell her the next time although I knew right away. How did I feel? Abandoned, thank you.

Now, we aren’t a perfect fit. She knows nothing about child development and hasn’t moved to correct that deficiency in the four years I’ve seen her. Being a parent is an important part of who I am. So, I found my answers on the internet like everyone else because she was of little help.

My sense of humor has defended and sustained me through difficult times. My “gallows humor” is a coping mechanism that has served me well. She discouraged me from using it to defend myself emotionally, yet she also had trouble with the result, more tears.

I tend to cry through almost every decision I make. It seems that made her nervous. I’d weep for five minutes and she wouldn’t say a word to comfort me. I mentioned that would be helpful and that I feel uncomfortable with her silence. No change.

I can’t help but think that she’s doing me a favor by setting me free.

I am not graduating from therapy now or in the future. I accept that as a person with bipolar, counseling is one of the fundamental supports to maintain my mental health, along with medication, exercise and friendship.

Time to begin a search for a new therapist. Today.

Have a healthy day and believe in yourself. –Rebecca

Clematis bud Photo: Rebecca Cuningham